Believe it or not the Internet does have a definition for “golf laugh”. It states a golf laugh is “To offer a short, polite chuckle to someone as an acknowledgement that they said something THEY think is amusing, but it really isn’t. To help someone not feel uncomfortable or embarrassed by politely laughing at their stupid joke.”
Suffices to say and considering the group of guys I hang with I golf laugh…… ALLOT. Aside from the Wrecking Ball and, occasionally, the Spanish Mackerel most of the BC guys just aren’t really that funny. Don’t get me wrong, they definitely believe they are. Perhaps it’s just me.
JL or Jim Laugh: Similar to golf laugh but instead of trying to be polite it has more of a “I am very uncomfortable with this line of joking around can you please stop now before I kill you” tone to it.
LOL or Laughing Out Loud: Often a term used by teenage girls…..or Lil’ Ball…..LOL
An article found on MSNBC.com states “Forget about opposites attracting. We like people who look like us, because they tend to have personalities similar to our own. And, a new study suggests, the longer we are with someone, the more similarities in appearance grow.”
Now I don’t know that I agree with this study, but I do know that if one more person mistakes me for the Red Dragon (a/k/a The Butcher) they may get a face full of my fist.
Now don’t get me wrong, I like me some Red Dragon, but other than the slimmest of resemblance we are nothing alike. For example:
-I ride my bike regularly = Seeing Red Dragon on a bike is like spotting Sasquatch in the Pacific NW;
-I like things neat and orderly = Red Dragon’s truck looks like a refuge dispenser;
-I’m quiet and reserved and don’t like to bring allot of attention to myself out in public = Red Dragon in a public place might be heard to say, in his most loud voice “do you remember that time I crapped my pants then threw my underwear at those nuns.”
So, the next time you see a guy riding his bike on the trail, his jersey neat and pressed, not making a sound……consider that maybe, just maybe, it is not the Red Dragon….It could be Sasquatch in disguise.
The last few days have been really good on the MTB (minus the $140 lost for another broken part as a result of ANOTHER crash). Instead of us doing the same ol’ same ol’, we have started putting in some pretty good efforts during the last few rides. Last night’s ride was a blast. It was a small crew with me, Wrecking Ball, Big Worm and Lil Ball. Big Worm was a man possessed. He kept the pace up most of the ride and when he wasn’t attacking, Wrecking Ball was. Even though the efforts definitely hurt it sure felt good to put them in. Unfortunately, the cold weather combined with all of the heaving breathing has got my lungs all screwed up. I’m hacking and coughing like a 70 year old man with COPD. Maybe this little extra kick in everyone’s step is the first sign that Spring and longer days are just around the corner. I can only hope.
The only thing missing from the rides this week were the rest of the crew who were fairly consistent in the early part of fall/winter (Marko, Steve, Berg, and Tim). Sure would like to see those guys back out with us on a weekly basis. Those guys along with the lost boys (Dan, Kent, Ken, Darien, Rick) would make ALMOST everything right in the mountainbiking world.
So, you want to be a part of the Chain Gang? Are you willing to wear the gang colors?
This picture goes out to brother Kent. No, he is not dead in the physical sense. Sure he’s “physically” out of shape and perhaps has hit rock bottom in the mountain biking sense, but he is still out there, somewhere, still kicking. We miss him on rides (some of the guys can actually remember what it was like to have him on a bike). There has been chatter about a comeback, perhaps him even winning the Georgia State Championship Series (although second place would be VERY respectable) in 2010. If you see him out there please pay your respects. Man I miss that guy.
A good size group of Bikechain’s posse made the trip to Fernandina Beach this past weekend for the second installment of the Florida State Championship MTB Series. Me, Big Worm, Wrecking Ball and Spanish Mackerel loaded up the truck on Saturday and headed over. Derwood with his liter, Red Dragon with the Ball and Chain, and Iceberg with his parental/sibling units also made the drive over Saturday. Marko and Silk got up before the chickens on Sunday morning and headed over in time to make the race.
Saturday’s pre-ride was uneventful. This course is fun to ride. Nothing real technical, but fast and flowy. You can lose your head on this course if you’re not careful (literally). There are quite a few low hanging limbs waiting to take your head off if you are not paying attention. Not a big deal on pre-ride but be careful on race day when oxygen deficit is maxed out. Load the truck back up, head to the hotel, get cleaned up then go find grub. Hmmm, ate at a really good Italian restaurant there last year so we hit it again. Good food, good times. Argue about what each of us owe, stress about it a little more until Big Worm starts to explode then head back to the hotel for some R&R. Watch a little Police Women of Broward County to look for lil Ronnie (Big Worm says he wears skirts and rides like a girl so he might be featured on the show). Get ready for sleep before a tap on the door. Bikechain’s CEO decides to make a late night sales call pimping the new Bike Chain gear. Swag and monies exchange hands and finally get rid of CEO. Lights out.
Six thirty came early. Big Worm did his usual jump right out of bed, head for the door and hit breakfast. The big man worries that he will not get his 5 waffles if he is not first to breakfast. Terry is on the big man’s heels. Me and Mackerel take a while to get motivated enough to get up. I am in my typical race day panic mode questioning why in the hell I put myself through the stress and aggravation that comes with racing. I can’t bring myself to eat much on race day due to nerves, but manage to swallow a bagel and banana. Off we go.
Yellow wave goes first. I’m in my second ever Sport race and about to soil myself on the starting line. Horrible start. I KNOW everyone is faster than me so I go into the woods near dead last. Crashed 2.5 times in the first lap. Needless to say, this is not going well. Get behind a few guys not going very fast and just sit there knowing I should get around. About get head taken off while trying to let Mr. Amazing Pro Dude (Bob) around. Three laps and cross the finish line in 20th place (out of 27 riders). Did I give it all I had NO, was I disappointed YES. If I can’t get these pre-race panic attacks in order then my racing days may be numbered. I’m pretty good at handing out water bottles. Maybe there’s a place for me as the MTB version of a domestique.
Congrats to Iceberg (1st); Big Worm (3rd) and Silk (4th) on their podium finishes. Great job to the Red Dragon and Bikechain for being the round sponsor . Tom Brown in two weeks. Trying to get my wife to get us out of town that weekend but no luck as of yet. Damn I may have to enter ANOTHER race. Do I feel lucky, well do I, punk.
Great ride on Sunday. Unfortuantely the numbers twindled as the ride went on. A little weird that out of 5 guys I’m the only one with hair on his legs.